Blog post by Brandy Edenfield
Change is so hard for me. Is it hard for you? Like, I really like the idea and excitement of the possibility of change, but the reality of walking out “change” in my life with joy and grace takes A LOT of intentional effort on my part.
My family recently made a move to a new city with my husband’s work. The opportunity was HUGELY exciting… four months ago! Our family talked about the “fun” of a new place. We had many conversations about “simplifying” our lifestyle since we were moving to a much smaller town and home. We hashed out details on how to be more intentional with our family time. Our kids were overjoyed with the opportunity to be going back to public school after three years in a small private school with limited athletics.
I personally felt hopeful for my work-life situation in this season. See, I have been a CPM (Certified Prayer Minister) with CUMI for nearly four years and in that time I have tried RELENTLESSLY to find work/family balance in my life. Constantly feeling like one area or the other was always lacking. So, my thought was, I’ll drive to the office to see clients one day, stay at my mom’s house and handle other office needs the next day. Creating in my life 5 full days to be wife/mom/homemaker and 2 full days to devote myself to work/ministry. EASY PEEZY RIGHT?
I literally used the words EASY PEEZY probably 50 times over that four months when laying out my plan to others. But remember, I’m not great at change. So, recognizing that I need to be intentional in order to execute this well I laid out a plan to arrive 9 days before the kids start school which would also let me try out my new work schedule while their schedule was open. I HAD A PLAN!!!! 10-days ago my family made the move. All went just as we planned that day. IT WAS A GOOD DAY!
The following morning my father-in-law’s wife passed away. This meant getting our kids back to my mom in Foley the next day and then traveling to Savannah, Ga for four days to help with plans, attend the funeral & help him wrap up loose ends.
We returned an hour before Hailey’s senior year school orientation at which time we found out her transcripts were incomplete. Several other “unplanned” inconveniences presented themselves to us over the next few days. It was a whirlwind! And none of it was on my “agenda”. Remember, change is hard for me.
But I truly wanted to do this well. I wanted to not only keep my peace but be a representative of peace in the storm. I would love to say it’s been a piece of cake and I’ve had total success. For the most part, I have kept my peace. But I’ve also had moments of anxiousness in my belly. Moments of frustration with my family. Moments of missing my routine. And yes, even moments of wanting my mom (at 43) LOL.
What I know right now as I sit in this cute little coffee shop, inviting you into my struggles, is that I can make all the plans in the world (plan every minute & every detail- and I believe it’s wise to plan ahead) however even with all my human planning, LIFE HAPPENS! It’s messy!
I need to invite Jesus into my plans to HAVE HIS WAY! To teach me to be flexible. He reminds me that my peace comes from Him, not my situations. He teaches me in these seasons that I need to be humble and to acknowledge He is God because His ways are better than mine. So this morning, I took extra time to read & say thank you to My God who promises to be my refuge & hiding place. To be my burden bearer. And to give me a peace that passes understanding.
Do you remember to invite Jesus into it? He is so good at directing our steps as He faithfully brings peace in every anxious step we take.
Father God, I am facing a lot of changes right now, (some good, some hard), I need your help to overcome and experience your peace in the midst of the journey. Thank you for your help. In Jesus name, amen.